"I've got worms!"

If you've met my little brother, you'll know what sort of non-stop character he is. Anything can spark his imagination or pique his interest. We were at the county fair one summer meandering through the master gardener section, and someone was there with a booth about worms. No, not parasites... earth worms. The wriggling kind that aerate your soil, help eat the compost pile down, and become chicken fodder. Nothing exciting there. But he thought the idea of having a bin full of worms as pets was the coolest thing ever. We already had the tiered worm bin from our previous attempt at keeping worms, Dad ordered some worm bedding (I think we ended up with some coconut shell stuffs), and Eli was all set to welcome his worms home. He had studied the handout from the worm booth and some books that we had on the shelf. I think he memorized them actually... He saved up his tooth fairy money to buy himself some new pets. His box of worms finally arrived via mail carrier. Actually, there were some worms that worked their way out of the box and into the mail truck. I feel sorry the the mail lady. I'm sure we have developed a reputation at the local post office... He came running up yelling, "I've got more pets than you! Do we have anything we can feed them?Look at them! Aren't they cute?"

Fast-forward about a year. My dad's aunt is visiting (we hadn't seen her since... well... I think I was but a wee tot); she hadn't met the charismatic storm that is Eli. Immediately following introductions and welcomes, Eli comes bursting in saying proudly, "I've got worms."

...

The look on my poor aunt's face. You could tell that she was thinking the problematic kind of worms. The kind that plagues carnivores, herbivores, and omnivores alike. The symbiotic relationship that is rather one-sided. We couldn't fill her in immediately. We had to relish the moment. The thought of having parasites is not exactly pretty. Let alone being that enthusiastic to inform others to your, umm, plight. We all had a really good laugh after explaining that it wasn't what she thought it was. 

Anways.

Sorry, random story. That memory came flooding back after watching The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey. 

Sunbathing Princess

She is a super model stuck inside the body of a deity -  Buddha. 

A New Perch

Guess where our turkeys have decided to spend their nights. 

Don't worry. We shoo them into the coop at night so predators won't get a bite of our Thanksgiving investment. ;) 

Scwu Dwiver

I tend to jump into something without knowing what I'm getting into. (Sound like something else that we're doing?) I'll have a general idea of what I'm doing, and I'll dive in head first. Trial by fire. Flying by the seat of my pants. Yep, that seems to sum up most of my attempts at projects. 

I mean, really, how hard would it be to build a roost for your chickens? 

- 2x2's? Check. 

- Battery operated screw driver in a lovely shade of yellow to make the job easier? Check. 

- Another one to have the hole maker attached? Check again. 

- Screws long enough to go through your wood? Check (after I realized that 1 1/2" screws will not go all the way through 2x2s...). 

- An ensurer of a right angle? Why would I need that? I'm making a roost; not furniture. 

- Pencil? Yep.

- Measuring tape? You betcha! New motto in life is going to be 'Measure twice; cut once'

- Table saw? Umm... Could I use a hand saw instead?

- Assistant? All possible helpers are making dinner. I think I'll let them have their fun.

Wow, these are technical terms. 

Before I go into the rest of the story, you need to understand my relationship with power tools. The most I can handle by myself is probably a staple gun. And even then, that isn't really a 'power' tool, and it doesn't have the 'kick' that the electric tools have. I can also yield at paint brush, but that usually ends up all over the place. I can use some hand tools. I seem to be able to manage those. They behave at least... 

Ahem. Onto the woodworking. 

I found some scrap 2x2's in my dad's collection in the shed, measured out the space, and went to town with the hand saw (proving, once again, that I'm a lefty in a right-handed world... someone needs to redesign those hand grips). First lesson of the day - hand saws do not make a very straight cuts... For a project perfectionist like me, this isn't cool... but I'm still not going to use the table saw yet. Wood cut to the supposedly, approximate length, I packed up the tools that I thought that I'd need. I watch Dad do this sort of stuff all the time; I should be able to do this, right? I got the wood all laid out where I wanted it to go, drilled the holes, picked up a screw, started to put the screw in, and... The screw drivers kept jumping and slipping. The screw head started to strip... Lesson learned - Make sure that you're drill bit is big enough for the screws that you grabbed. Next, make sure that you have the right driver bit. Even after these slight adjustments were made, I still can't get the screws to go in straight. Well, one cannot go about making horrific sounds like that Dewalt without someone coming to see 'how it's going.' Well, help came to the rescue after the 'check up,' and my sister and I finished the roost. 

Being the project perfectionist that I am, I don't think that I could show you pictures - it is quite a pitiful thing. There isn't a single right angle or level spot on that sucker. Maybe it's a good thing that I'm not in carpentry or the construction business. But it serves its purpose - the chickens aren't sleeping on the floor anymore. 

Entropy and Chain Reactions

Picture from here

When you overcrowd poultry or they see a molecule of blood, they go cannibalistic on each other. Not joking. There is a dark side of chickens that isn't always talked about in those nice little backyard bird books. So, there I am, building a makeshift brooder divider out of fruit packaging from last summer's bounty and masking tape, and Mom is smearing what we lovingly call 'bum balm' on a poor victim. The grand opening of this year's chick ER was short lived though - we found another patient. Leave it to all those little boys... they just beat each other up. Off to the ER with you! After your slathering of the rooster booster, of course.

After we get the birds all settled in, Mom headed out to run some errands, and I was cleaning myself up from  chicken adventures (when you have a lot running around, you run into weird things apparently...), Eli, the mini-man, bursts in through the door, "Sarah, the gate latch is broken!" Say, what? The shoes go back on, and we headed back out to inspect the damage. We almost had a llama stampede. They see an opportunity to make a run for it, and they seize it. Eli held the gate shut as I headed to the barn to get some twine to tie the gate shut (it's amazing all the things you can do with that stuff). I opened the back barn door, snuck past mamma goose, and found some twine, just as Eli shouts, "LLAMAS!" Oy vey. I didn't close the back door. In comes llama stampede. And the front doors were wide open. That could have been lovely... While trying to get the llamas shooed back to where they belong, one of them decided to walk through the goose fence, and she promptly tripped over it and bent it. Being the stoic llama that she is, she nonchalantly got up and proceeded to join the rest of the herd in the stall, uninjured despite her fall.

I did another run through and checked on everybody, just in case - they all seemed good for now.

All that said - I should probably go inspect everyone, again. ;)
Until next time!
~*SG*~

Behind the scenes, bloopers and outtakes

Being in a wedding entails many things. New dress, new shoes, fancy hair, etc... but one of the never mentioned consequences of agreeing to be in a wedding is all the, umm... flattering pictures that people will get of you. It also helps when the videographer knows you and seems to stalk you with his camera. Just saying... ;) 

There were at least four cameras clicking away during the photo session. Which one to look at. Hmm...

Times be a-changin'

The bridesmaids were not the only ones to be trouble makers.

Wait, did I miss some lint on his suit?

Brothers... What can I say?

It would've been priceless if in focus. :P

There must have been something on the ground or we were looking at our boots.

Don't worry! Only a lot more pictures to go!

My bubbles. They be gone.

You want us to go where? 

Leap frog

Say what?

The guardians of the candle lighters. Don't mess with them.

And for the piece-de-resistance!

I spy...

How many cats do you see in the box? 

Chocolate Chips

It seemed to be a normal trip. Go to the food, pick up the food, haul the food home, unload the food, put all the food away. Done deal, right? Nope. Well, actually, yes, except for the last little bit.

I had just poured in an entire 1 lb. bag into the chocolate chip container in the pantry but the chips looked ever so slightly different. Only one way to investigate: taste test. Lo-and-behold, what I thought were chocolate chips were not chocolate chips at all. They were carob chips.

Now, before I proceed, you must understand my relationship with chocolate. I love it. The darker the better. I get antioxidants and endorphin releasing powers running through my system. Carob on the other hand is a chocolate impostor. You take a handful of the bits only to be thoroughly disappointed when your taste buds react to the not-so-chocolate-y-ness. Bleh.

Back to the story. We needed to return the bag since it obviously wasn't what we thought it was. There was only one problem - the carobs had mingled with the chocolates. I had just unintentionally created much more work than I had anticipated. I handpicked every piece of carob and put it into its rightful bag to return. An entire pound of the things. Oy. This was a job that required chocolate and patience. But I survived with the help of chocolate which was conveniently at hand if I picked out the carob.

Goodnight!

A Mini Christmas Tree

Kids. Ya gotta love 'em. They have very different ideas about things than what you (the adult) could even begin to imagine. 

Case in point:

Today, as a family was getting out of their vehicle, one of the kids was begging for a mini Christmas tree. My dad offered the parents a killer deal for a small second tree, and they agreed. They successfully slayed the first tree and began hunting for the next. As they were tromping through the field the child picked up one of the sheared off tree tops and declared that he had found the perfect mini Christmas tree. The 'tree' was just the over-achieving efforts of a tree to be tall that was taken off. It really was just a stick covered with some needles and some stem buds, perfectly straight. Smaller than a Christmas tree seedling. Not even big enough to consider a Charlie Brown tree. But it was perfect. The little boy came back skipping and ever so happy about finding the perfect mini-tree. 

I will most certainly have more tales to tell from the Christmas tree farm adventures. Stay tuned. 

Kevin

There once was a baby chicken. She was not like the other 50 chicks that she was shipped with. You see, when someone orders over fifty chickens from the hatchery, they send you a free, 'rare' bird with the order. When the box arrived, there were 50 Cornish crosses and this special little black chick. No on could figure out what breed she was or if it was a he or a she! For her first 10 weeks of life, she grew up with the disgusting meat birds; always the smallest of the bunch (Cornish cross grow at a ridiculous, unnatural rate). Well, the time came for her ugly white accomplices to leave forever. I don't think that she misses them that terribly, but she took a certain liking to me. I never gave her any special attention, nor was I the primary caretaker. 

With her freaky mail-order friends now gone, we needed to integrate her into our existing flock. They didn't take a particular liking to her at all. With all the hen-pecking going on, she kept close to me while I was doing the chores. I walked across the driveway, and she followed me. I walked back to the barn, and she ran after me. The other hens started giving her a hard time, and she flew right up onto my shoulder and sat down. Then I walked back across the yard, and she stayed on my shoulder. I filled water buckets and she sat right on top of the well head watching me. I tried to set up a small pen for her on the lawn and she flew right out and ran after me again. But that's not all - she even sat at the front door all afternoon trying to get into the house. 

This chicken needed a different name. Eli had originally named it 'Waspus.' Ask the 7 year-old what he was thinking when he named it that. But yesterday afternoon, we decided that she needed a new name to fit this outgoing personality. It was unanimous; the bird's new name would be 'Kevin' after the bird in Disney Pixar's 'Up.' 

And yes, Kevin is a girl. 

Signs of Singleness - For the Gents

Hello, ladies. Have you ever contemplated the behaviors of single males? Well, have you? After interviewing most of the single guys that I know, I must inform you – the generalizations about them are true. All of them said almost the exact same things in very separate interviews.

When they congregate with like-minded individuals, they don’t sit around the fondue pot – they go on a camping trip to the middle of nowhere with the sole purpose of shooting each other with a big boy’s version of a cap gun. The more welts, bruises, and broken skin, the better! They don’t ‘chat’ either – they yell things like, “THIS IS SPARTA!” at the top of their lungs while charging the enemy lines during said air soft war. Meanwhile the Rambo-like character on the other team is charging at you shouting “LEROY!”

Movie night? Nope. Well… not really. Let’s go see the latest, greatest, shoot-em-up movie in theaters! And they have it in 3D?! Now we have a chance to wear the funny glasses! But 3D movies cost a lot of money, so if they’re strapped for cash, maybe a Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, or the Bourne Trilogy marathon will do. Do you think that they’ll sit still long enough to watch a chick flick? These aren’t the movies you’re looking for.

According to the interviewees, food is VERY important. But not just any food – no! – it needs to be from a box. Yes, you heard me right, ladies; the less prep, dishes and ‘creativity’ the better. Things like Top Ramen, Kraft mac and cheese, hot dogs, bachelor salad… What? Never heard of that before? I hadn’t either. Apparently, you buy pre-cut lettuce, dump it onto a plate, then pour the ranch dressing over it all. The lettuce is just a delivery system for the ranch and an excuse to say that you ate some green food when Mom calls that Sunday afternoon. There is one exception to the rule of minimal prep – BBQ. Any food that involves hanging out around a fire with a cold beer in one hand and the world’s biggest spatula in the other is heaven for any man. So, ladies, you just about died of a heart attack looking at the menu, didn’t you? Don’t worry. This is where you have a chance to save them because they do like good home cookin’ so long as it isn’t too girly, fancy, green or meat-free. It just needs to taste good.

Road trip anyone? If you thought that guys didn’t do the ‘touchy-touchy’ thing, please think again. How do you think that 5 full grown men go to the campsite in one car? It wasn’t a truck either. They squished into the commuter car. Someone needs to inform the Asian car makers that the back seat doesn’t have enough room for legs, arms or heads. German cars, well, they’re a little better’ it depends on the model that you get. Nicer car = more expensive. Now, if you were to invest the extra money that you spend on 3D movies, you could potentially get that expensive, ritzy luxury vehicle, but do you want to drive that on a camping trip? I didn’t think so.

The bigger the better right? Why do you think that they came up with 2-handed swords, m1garands, tanks, fighter jets, battleships, aircraft carriers, monster trucks, v8 engines, grenades, illegal fireworks, explosives, mountain climbing, 12-gage shotguns… oh goodness… the list can go on. “All the better to impress you with!”

They have hobbies, too. When it’s pouring rain with thunder and lightning with a chance of tornadoes and they don’t feel like getting much of an adrenaline rush, they need to stay occupied - inside. Prank plotting, insult throwing, movie quoting, character stat comparing, dream team creating, Mac vs. PC warring, pizza box collecting are all just a few options that a single guys has. But the choicest of the crop would be video games and anything associated with video games. Especially LAN parties because you can sit in the comfort of your thrift shop recliner with a lap top illuminating you face while still beating up your friends. It would be even better if said friends were all in the same room eating all your potato chip and Twizzler stash.

What about pets? Do they like to snuggle the cat while reading a good book and sipping tea? I think you can answer that one yourself. Let me give you an example of what would happen if they were to get, say, a fish. Ed was an Oscar. He was as big, mean and ugly as they come. Now, I want you to try to imagine what Ed would get to do since he was in the men’s dorm. You probably can’t even begin to imagine – I’ll just tell you. Once a week, Ed would get to be in a kiddie pool with a bunch of goldfish. They would all place bets on how many goldfish Ed would eat before he rolled over from eating too much. What? A fish needs to eat!

Are we allowed to talk about clothes in an essay about men? No! Okay, how about interior decorating? No? Okay… fine… 

Is this too wordy for an essay on men?

{Captivating}

With everything going on around here, I haven't a whole lot of time to blog... or keep my promise to give you a better glimpse of my latest Regency dress.

v detailing of the embroidery on the sleeve

But how boring would normal 'here's the dress' pictures? So a friend and I got together, grabbed her brother with the really nice camera, and headed outside to take some pictures. :)

Umm... yeah. This can either be 'da smirk' or 'you can't be serious' or an Emma Woodhouse expression.

Yep. This is us and our personalities shining through.


Shiny! Feather! Flower!
Then we quickly changed into our more summery dresses and headed back outside. I couldn't help but drag her along for some time on the trampoline. :)

Secrets

So, now that I have been released from my oath to silence and have some time to fill you in on some very important details from our "Epic May Ball Prank"... I guess it's time to blog it and share it with the whole world.

To get some sense of what we did... See this movie.

http://video.ak.fbcdn.net/cfs-ak-ash4/232011/144/10150196965145270_29332.mp4?oh=7bb16988e43369c3291615fe39db25aa&oe=4DDD9E00&__gda__=1306369536_19617138cbd5f2c170daab48d76adbfa

To explain what the heck is going on...

Last September, we went on a camping trip - in the pouring rain. As harmless as it seemed, I think Sonia seriously wounded Nathan's pride by sticking rubber duckies in front of him while blaring the rubber duckie song (you do remember the rubber duckie song, right?). He took his time to retaliate.

The master plan consisted of a secret dance society and the main demo dance group (two people had no clue what was about to happen to them). We met secretly while working on the dance to help Nathan know the dance. He was going to switch in the middle with Daniel and dance with Sonia. (Side note: Nathan made it quite clear to everyone that he would never dance.)

So we practiced in secret while also trying to appear clueless when we practiced with the main demo group. Quite interesting I must say. And there were several times that someone also spilled the beans. No one caught on though.

The night of the ball arrived. The demo team was ready. The switch had been practiced to perfection and was executed perfectly. The faces of the two people who had been left in the dark were absolutely priceless. Actually, I think that their jaws hit the floor for a moment. Meanwhile the rest of us had to try to keep the dance together even though we were all about to burst into laughter (keep in mind, we were still 'performing').

All in all, it was taken quite well. Humorously in fact. We shall see what becomes of the prank war.

Whew!

Well... sorry that I haven't posted in quite a long time! o_O I haven't fallen off the face of the earth, I didn't get raptured, but I have been living it up quite a bit these past couple of weeks. To the point of exhaustion. Let's see... Last weekend, I taught the home ec class all afternoon, stayed up late partying at a graduation party turned game night, stayed awake during the sermon at church, attended a going away party, and then immediately turned around and crashed another party right across town (we sorta came uninvited to a b-day party to call some dances for the b-day girl). Yep, I can see how that weekend alone would whoop somebody to the ground.

But apparently, I'm a social butterfly. I didn't stop with one weekend. I had to go for two. This last weekend started Thursday night. We went to dance class and then took the party to DQ. Friday, we got up early, freaked out about cougar sightings, got turkeys situated at their new home, and headed off to Sauvie Island for a picnic lunch on the beach - only the river was so high there wasn't much beach. We then went to a friend's to watch "Father Goose," eat chocolate fudge icecream and chocolate dipped strawberries. On Saturday, I opted out of going to the beach, because my goodness, things do have to get done around the house and farm. Late that afternoon, we got ready for the ball, ate pizza dinner as daintily as possible to not get our dresses smudged with tomato sauce, then headed off to the Count of Monte Cristo Ball. Cue pictures:

The count himself came to the ball! :D

Dancing, dancing!

Ooh! Pretty dresses!

Some lovely ladies. I'll do a seperate post detailing my dress. :)

Okay, story time. Prank wars tend to get intricately elaborate. This last prank involved almost a dozen people. Most of whom were sworn to secrecy. The below picture is the group after the prank. I guess I'll have to do another post detailing this as well. :)

After the ball, we headed to Sheri's to keep the pary going. Got home at exactly 12:05.

The next morning I managed to stay awake during the sermon - again. :) I was quite proud of myself. But the weekend was far from over. Sunday afternoon, the group headed to the near by mall to do a photo scavenger hunt. Here are some of the pictures from the team I was on.

Men in Apple store = waiting...

Can you guess which movie this is from? v

We can fit way more than two people in this thing. >:D

Hollywood star = being famous = signing autographs. Nice glasses by the way.

Our uncreative, but cute, human pyramid.

Camping! In the store!

When I was a little kid, I liked to play in the clothes racks. I finally emerged after getting lost in the men's clothing department.

Group Shot! :D

So now... I think I'll enjoy a quite week at home. As far as I know, the calender is empty for next weekend. Let's see how fast it can fill up.